TEN CONYOMANDMENTS

TEN CONYOMANDMENT

by Gerry Avelino and Arik Abu

 

1. Thou shall make gamit "make+pandiwa".

ex. "Let's make pasok na to our class!"

"Wait lang! I'm making kain pa!"

"Come on na, we can't make hintay anymore! It's in Andrew pa, you know?"

 

2. Thou shall make kalat "noh", "diba" and "eh" in your pangungusap.

ex. "I don't like to make lakad in the baha nga, no? Eh diba it's like, so eew, diba?"

"What ba: stop nga being maarte noh?"

"Eh as if you want naman also, diba?"

 

3. When making describe a whatever, always say "It's SO pang-uri!"

ex. "It's so malaki, you know, and so mainit!"

"I know right? So sarap nga, eh!"

"You're making me inggit naman.. I'll make bili nga my own burger."

 

4. When you are lalaki, make parang punctuation "dude",

“ENGANAL is so hirap, pare."

"I know, tsong, I got bagsak nga in quiz one, eh"

 

5. Thou shall know you know? I know right!

ex. "My bag is so bigat today, you know"

"I know, right! We have to make dala pa kasi the jumbo Physics book eh!"

 

6. Make gawa the plural of pangngalans like in English or Spanish.

ex. "I have so many tigyawats, oh!"

 

7. Like, when you can make kaya, always use like. Like, I know right?

ex. "Like, it's so init naman!"

"Yah! The aircon, it's, like sira!"

 

8. Make yourself feel so galing by translating the last word of your sentence, you know,

your pangungusap?

ex. "Kakainis naman in the LRT! How plenty tao, you know, people?"

"It's so tight nga there, eh, you know, masikip?"

 

9. Make gamit of plenty abbreviations, you know, ex. "Like, OMG! It's like traffic sa LRT"

"I know right? It's so kaka!"

"Kaka?"

"Kakaasar!"

 

10. Make gamit the pinakamaarte voice and pronunciation you have para full effect!

ex. "I'm, like, making aral at the Arrhneo!"-->Arrhneo!)) Ano ka, SLENG!?))

"Me naman, I'm from Lazzahl!" --Di ka masyado ma Z, diba lang.))

(yey! someone made a list! stole this from my cousin's friend's blog. hehe.)

Thank you for the Greetings

(please sing to the tune of Thank you for the music by abba!!)

Thank you for the greetings..

The friends I’m bringing.

 Thanks to all the food I’m eating…

 Who can live without it?

I ask in all honestyyy.

What would life beee?  

With out my friends and my family?

And I say thank you for the greetings!

For giving it to meeee.

After all my hints and signs and warnings! Thanks to all who greeted me!! Its super heart warming! Bwhahaha! Especially thank you SARS for creating that blogsite http://chesca24bday.blogspot.com/  although........ lots of people were coming up to me, saying that you threatened them to post. Most of them got scared! What exactly did you say to them? Hahaha!! I was at work when I read that, I saw the link in cha’s post. Hehe. But it was 1am.. and I was doing the thank you blog. So when you reminded me to check it out again.. I was at work… and started tearing up. But didn’t show anyone that I was. Hahaha! sobrang sayang basahin!! And it’s PINK! I love it!!!

And mr. vince ku, you’re now the hottest guy in my life’s social network. Really! Everyone’s been asking me. Who’s that Vince? Ches! Is that your boyfriend?? Hey Vince! Please clear our names! Help me out here! Funny post BTW . yours is the most popular post!. You never fail to crack me up! Bwahahaha. Vince is half-indian pala, and my ex-officemate from canon schmanon.

Like chix said, not that you’re asking for it, but this is what happened today. Lets start at yesterday. A friend called me up to greet me happy birthday!! Sabi nya, friend: happy birthday!! Ako: Advanced happy birthday you mean.. friend: its aug10! Ako: urmm, 8pm palang ditto! Hehe. So medyo maling timezone but that friend was the first one who greeted me in Philippine aug10 time. Hehe.

So today, when I woke up, I immediately checked my ym. And thanked people for greeting me. Hehe. What with my YM status saying that its my birthday today. Who wouldn’t right?

I go to work and started snapping up on pics of dubai. My officemates all greeted me, except the office witches. Its super fun! I open my laptop and immediately went online.

Debbie and liz handed me a birthday card each. Its so sweet. Ive never had a birthday card since I don’t know... elementary? They call me Francesca here. Refusing to call me chesca. And it sucks when they shortcut it and call me Fran! Yuck. Fran! Gross… good mood..come back!

I really wasn’t planning on working today. Just loiter in YM and thank people for greeting me. Hehe. So sars goes online! Yey! I’m always excited when she’s online! she’s the first person who reads all of these blogs. Well no, its just I tell her the story first. Then when I feel like it,then, I post a blog about it. anyhoo. So she tells me about that blogpost thing. And I look at it! keep quiet and read it for sometime... inhaling all the greetings.. laughing most of the time!. Then suddenly, my boss emails me that something like .. “food glorious food” because debbie's started to talk about food. And I WAS laughing on my email! Debbie asked.. “what are you laughing at?” I pressed ALT+TAB at the speed of sound and switched to the blogspot window. I said, look! My friend did this website and let all my other friends greet me from the Philippines.. liz and chris (boss), huddled up and said.. awww that’s so sweet! That’s very nice! But immediately lost interest when they spotted a few tagalog greetings.. hehe. They said, can you tell your friend to make me one? (as a joke)

So, I continued my reading/chatting with people. By lunch time, they called me up to the meeting room again! And there on the table is my homemade birthday cake! Baked by Liz! It’s delicious! Sweet and spodgy (a term they used.)

My cake

Blowing the candles

Chris is my boss, lanky with a broken wrist

Chef Liz, tall blonde in black.

My mom cooked spaghetti and bought cake at home. They’re all celebrating my birthday without me. After eating they called me up!! Hehe. I talked to everyone. And they keep on asking me about marble slab and how fat ive become.

I ordered krispy kreme yesterday, and it arrived at the office at half past 2. This is my birthday treat for everyone. I gave everyone donuts! Even the witches! Hehe. Oh boy! Those brits love it! chris was so sick from eating too much. Chris: “im so full, why am I doing this to myself?”

Then junnis went online to greet me. seriously, im not surprised if you forgot! grr. Saying she sent something. Um, as long as its nothing kinky. And its not PORK. Hopefully it’ll turn up fine. But im guessing it’s a book! Is it the “the intimate adventures of a London call girl”?? that’s it! isn’t it? Or is it natsuo kirino’s latest novel? 

Mau also went online, I told her to video japan and treat herself. Care of me. Then send me the video! I miss japan!

I went home bringing the rest of the boxes filled with krispy kreme. When I get home, I see a gift on my bed! It’s from my roomie! Its sooo sweet! It’s a terry pratchett book with chace Crawford’s pic on it.. awww. We’re not close, and we hardly talk, yet she got me something!! Yey! I laid the krispy kreme boxes and fed them all donuts! Hehe.(see sars, ive told  this story to you.)

Then lalaine called!! She called!! From California!! Its soooo fun to hear from her!! She met up with ponchi in cali!! i cant believe how much i miss this  person!  paos pa  boses! haha

At the end of the day. I went out with my aunt and uncle and treated them for the 2^nd time to noodle bowl. Another Chinese restaurant. I was super full and satisfied! And that ends my 24^th birthday celebration!! Back to reality tomorrow, no wait,  chris hasnt got me a gift yet. and debbie will treat me to lunch tomorrow.

I still gotta finish eclipse soon.

Cheers!

Thanksgiving at 24

Yey! The day finally came! I’m finally 24! And it feels the same. I planned to write a blog with nothing planned. Then, it just occurred to me, that all ive been blogging about previously are whines and gripes about my life and living here in dubai! All I did was be racist and say bad stuff about things and people! Its time to count blessings and be thankfull for everything! I’m now 24 trying to be mature about life and stuff.

Thank you mama! For always encouraging me! I’m whining to you the most! And when I whine or get irritated, I don’t hold back. I’m sorry about that. But in the end, im thankful for you being there at  click of a button. Talking with you every week is totally worth  it.

Thank you mikee! For being healthy! And studying hard! Hehe.

Thank you Nicole! For also chatting with me and making work time more fun! I miss chatting with you recently though!

Thank you Tita Mina and Tito Chito! I always feel your presence through mama!

Thanks to my friends! Who are chatting with me everyday!  Its always fun to talk to you guys!  Believe it or not, although I sometimes sound weird or stupid or crazy, you guys keep me sane! I’ll say this.. I LOVE YOU ALL.

Thank you friends on multiply! For commenting on my posts. For leaving your most precious thoughts for me to ponder on. Or just reading what ive trashed about yet again.

Thanks to Tita loi and tito cael who took me in, for constantly feeding me and helping me with surviving abroad!

Thank you experience! I’ve only been here in dubai for 5 months and I’ve learned a whole lot about living! I’ve learned  how to cook, do the laundry and budgeting expenses. I’ve learned that not all of your kababayans are nice! I’ve learned that people are struggling hard to earn money. I’ve learned that the color of your skin matters. I’ve learned that despite everything I’m still lucky with how everything turned out. I’ve learned that’s it’s quite hard to be separated from your family.

Thank you to my current company. My boss is nice. Some of my co-workers are nice. And I don’t have anyproblems with commuting , and I’m not stressed with work at all.

Thank you to the beach! You’re nice.

Thank you to my cousins here in dubai!

Thank you God! For helping me cope up! For all the things! for all the trials!! For the strength!

That’s how my Oscar speech would be like, 2 years from now! =) hehe.

Oh and I love you all! LOVE!!

my early treat aug 08

its only august 8, but my aunt said that i should just treat them today for my birthday. so i willingly complied. it's so weird, i feel really weird . happy birthday don’t mean a thing. I don’t feel happy. I wonder why. Usually i feel elated when i treat my relatives. Now, it’s just like we ate out. And i treated them. Thats that. Its sooo weird. Or may be its because its still not my birthday and they’re not all gushing about it. No, even if they greeted me. I don’t know. Or may be because i just celebrated my first birthday without my family. My mum and my annoying mortal enemy (my brother). And our extended family, my aunt and uncle with whom i stayed at for 6 months while i was learning how to drive and my cousin, whose super duper arte! Hehe.

Well, okay, what do i feel. Homesickness. Is this it? Am i allowing myself to think about it? No. I refuse. It’s a super sucky feeling. And i hate it that i’m just realizing the crappy consequences of living abroad. Crap. Stop.

Okay here goes, we watched mummy 3 yesterday. And IT IS CRAP. It doesn’t even deserve to be reviewed! Crap crap crap, waste of time and money. The only thing good about watching that movie is eating the biggest crepe i’ve had in my life! Its a Humongous crepe! With chocolate bananas and strawberries! I ate it all in the movie house! Hehe

Wow, did i just change my mood by talking about food? Well. Thats it. August 10... here i come. Wonder what it’ll feel like to be 24. Just the same. For sure.

Advanced Birthday Celebration

First time that I’ll have to celebrate me birthday away from home. I’m trying to recall my birthday last year. I think I did another super overtime. I didn’t go home early. We had to do something urgent, among all the other urgent things we did back then. Ah.. the funtimes at canon. I really do miss that company. I learned a lot and enjoyed my friends there. Just didn’t enjoy the latter part. Hehe.

Back to this year, well my birthday’s still on Sunday, but my seat mate, Debbie decided to treat me today.  Since I haven’t seen mamma mia (which is was dying to see), we saw that. Super fun. But how did that happen?

It’s all because of my accidental fishing powers. I use a small mug at the office, a small brown mug that I use for drinking water or sometimes tea. But while I was walking down the super market, I saw this huge mug with a LEO (zodiac sign) print on it. It’s not the best mug in the world, but it was the last LEO mug! So I bought it and brought it home. I used it for a while. It came with a glass spoon and a glass cover. Within seconds, I accidentally broke the spoon. Next day, I brought it to work, poured water on it and started drinking. Then Debbie, because she sits next to me saw my awfully huge mug and the print on it. “oh a leo, when’s your birthday?” me:”this Sunday august 10” Debbie: “very well then, ill give treat you on Tuesday!” since Tuesday was mamma mia day. We were going to watch mamma mia with Liz (Elizabeth Turner from pirates of the Caribbean)

Its Tuesday today and for lunch Debbie ordered sushi for lunch, because she knows I love it. I;m in dubai, and still eating sushi. Liz loves it too. Debbie couldn’t bear eating raw fish. “why would you put yourself through that?”

See pics below. My pinay friends are jem and marj.

 

During the day Debbie was super excited about eating and watching the movie, though she’d seen it a couply o’days ago. And it annoyed my boss. My boss Chris, sits on my right side. He can’t concentrate when Debbie blabs about Mamma mia and Marble Slab and whatnot. He hates musicals and thinks marble slab is crap.  He’s a pastey ol bloke, tall, lanky and he’s got a broken wrist. But a nice guy in general, I ride with him home whenever I can, coz he lives on the same street as me. So, we chatter away until 430pm. And off we go to the mall of the emirates. (no one wanted to watch mamma mia with me, so i ended up going with them blondies.)

Chatter while driving, we can’t stop talking about office gossip. Lots of office politics going on.  So we first check out the cinema, we get the 1900 showing of mamma mia. Then head straight to starbucks. check out the fat  chicks below. hehe. FAT. Liz got me a cup. Really, im not paying for anything! We sat and gossiped some more. Liz about her jerky male acquaintance. And more about office crap. See here, the accounts, 4 witches, and all Filipinas are complete and utter bitches. They’ve been bullying me ever since I stepped in the office. I just ignore them and avoid them.What I didn’t know is that they’re also undermining Debbie’s authority. They hardly talk to these british girls. So we continue describing how bitchy and vicious they are.

Just also found out that Liz is 21 and a college student in Italy. She’s just working part time in our company, taking up English Literature! Since we were in a starbucks inside bookshop, its books galore, recommendations. Ive gotten a few, and now, I can finish the twilight saga without having to go back to reading shopaholic anymore! Yey!

Then more culture sharing.. oh in the UK, oh in the Philippines..  forgot every nonsense we talked about.

Half past 6, we go out of starbucks. And head to Marble slab!! The most fantastic ice cream parlor ever. http://www.marbleslab.com Well not really. But its cool, you get to choose any ice cream and anytoppings as much as you want! I got strawberry with dark chocolate, and my toppings were chocolate chips, marshmallows, blue berries, nuts, m&ms and cookie dough.(but there are loads more toppings like raspberry, butterfingers, nuts, candy floss, gummy bears) Yum! Debbie’s treat!

Then we got a huge plate o nachos with tons of salsa, cheese and jalapenos!  I tuck my bottled water and enter the movie house.

Loved the movie. And we really enjoyed ourselves. They’re planning on another girl’s night out. May be a trip to abu dhabi. Or tea in the afternoon (they say its very british).  One of their goals is to get me a hangover. Because ive never had one and they said I gotta get that on my bucket list.  Chris didn’t want me to go with them. I told him, “chris, what if I turn out to be like one of them” chris:”ill fire you!” that’s a joke. Chris:”are you really going with them? Don’t go, just tell them you need to cut your nails or something. Marble Slab is CRAP”  True enough, that night chris texted me “marble slab! Cheers!” me: “super fun! And super fat! Beware, we’ll be singin tomorrow. cheers” chris: “I think I feel ill already.”

Debbie brought me home. We talked about musicals, theatres, movies, ballets, all that stuff. Hopefully there’ll be another girl’s night out.. I really enjoyed it. The gossip and movies! I miss my friends from the Philippines! I reckon I’ll have loads more fun. It’s sometimes hard to keep up, my ears are bleeding from all the English.. But I’m getting used to it.  I ate way too many marble slabs. I’m sleepy but don’t want to sleep, I’m still too fool,  I mean full. Cheers.

Operation Picasso

Picasso’s paintings can be found in the emirates palace in abu dhabi. So the UPAA-UAE decided to go on the trip there. So I tagged along. There were 7 cars on convoy and we travelled for over 2 hours. We ate in one of the member’s house .. humungous house !    

Our gay friends was like “ano ito? Mosque?” hehe

Anyway, we ate, and shared about dubai experiences. Turns out i’ve had it easy. And one of the told us his story about rethinking about life. One day, he got tired of dubai and decided to go to the Philippines, he got all of his money and bought a ticket Thailand (0nly flight out). He didn’t kknow what to do anymore. Goodthing his sister was in Malaysia and talked him out of his stupor. He went back to the dubai and moved on as usual. Only about 10000 dirhams poorer because of his impulsive trip. I think its because he had a fight with his boyfriend. 

So after all the sharing, we went to the emirates palace. But holy mackerels! It was close! Because the sheik was there and there was some delegation going on. What a waste of trip! We ended up hanging out in the nearest mall.

What a waste of blog. Hehe.

Well, abu dhabi was nice. I think nicer than dubai. And it’s not as congested. So in the end we weren’t able to see Picasso. I hope they plan another trip. I would’ve wanted to see it. Not really. Hehe.

Operation – failed.

Mamma Mia!!

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Romantic Comedy

Why in the world did I not watch this movie sooner?? What the hell was I thinking???! I LOVED IT! I was smiling the whole time. I even cried a little bit..  meryll streep was the best! She really brought all these emotions in me! She made me want to jump out of my seat and start dancing in the middle of Greece!! I really really wanted to get up and dance! But that didn’t keep me from singing…!! Hehehe.. I was singing! Really! While watching the movie!! In the cinema!! Loved the whole Greece setting, the beach the sun!! and the fake tan!!! Julie walters was hilarious! Everyone was hilarious!! I was laughing at every bit of it! Over the top laughing!! Hahahahaha. And after the movie, my face hurt from smiling and laughing!! Oh I’ve never felt all perky and energetic!

I love musicals, when they’ll sing all over, like the whole world knows the song.. then after the number, they just carry on like nothing happened. Hahaha! Its brilliant!

You can dance! You can jive! Having the time of your life! ooooooh See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen!!



Bwahahah! Definitely a movie worth watching again! Heck I’d watch it at home, then sing and dance all over!! Hahaha!